Let your kids own there future

My daughter is one of those kids who’s upset she has an A instead of an A+ in PE.

I'm not worried about her at all.

But I still show up for conferences and encourage her to go too. I want her to hear first hand how she's doing and what she can improve.

Her teachers have nothing but good things to say. So, conferences are very short and come with a big confidence and ego boost for her. It’s nice to hear how great you are. This is an opportunity to turn the dad-pride up to 11 and pile on the praise.

Watching the other parents I noticed a real contrast in styles. One mother in particular we overheard talking to teachers about college prep, advanced placement classes, etc. (these kids are still in MIddle School) illustrated for me something a lot of high achieving parents get wrong.

Yes, parents should be informed and interested in their children’s education. However, there’s a line where we take ownership away from our kids. We take them out of the driver seat. In so doing we identify their accomplishments as our own. We usurp the victories that should be theirs.

If we give them the opportunity to thrive or fail, we not only set them up for “the real world”, we also let their wins be their wins (unadulterated by our “help”).

Don’t constantly drive them. Let them drive themselves to success.

Stand back and watch your kid kick ass.

Then praise the hell out of them.

That’s all for now.
See you tomorrow
- Daniel Otto Spencer Polehn