It's dangerous to go alone

I get together with the same group of guys weekly.

Words can’t fully express how valuable these men are to me.

I can share anything with them. Struggles with my kids or work. My internal conflicts about what I truly want life. I’ve mourned death and broken down in tears in front of these guys.

They’ve been there for me. And I, in turn, have been there for them.

Living in community, having people to be vulnerable with, is extremely valuable for the mere fact that you will recognize your experience is not unique.

You’re human.
This thing we call life is hard.

It’s extremely validating to discover other people struggle the same way you do.

As much as I want to be radically vulnerable in every part of life, there are some things that are simply not right to share publicly (on social media or an email like this for example). Talking about wounds from parents or a spouse, by definition, is airing someone else’s dirty laundry. And I don’t think most people will open up to a group of strangers on the internet either. A close group of trusted friends you meet with in person is irreplaceable.

If you don’t have something like this already, be the change you need to see in the world. Invite someone to join you regularly for open ended discussion. It doesn’t have to be fancy. Pick someone you easily connect with and tell them “I’ll be at X place at Y time. Feel free to join me.”

You never know what that could turn into in a few years.

That’s it for now.
Until tomorrow.
- Daniel Otto Spencer Polehn